Tools for staying alive(collection)

 Table of contents

·        Introduction

·        Poem 1

·        Poem 2

·        Poem 3

·        Poem 4

·        Poem 5

·        Poem 6

·        Poem 7

·        Poem 8

·        Mini story

·        Outro

 

Introduction

 

Just enjoy this collection, with whatever playlist you find suitable. It’s formless so it’ll adapt to whatever environment it’s thrown in

 

Poem 1

 

This thing is called love…

This illusion we desperately chase,

Hoping to embrace,

As we seek solace.

 

It's all but a lie,

To make you feel fly,

Quite possibly keep you alive,

For a long while.

 

But love doesn't exist,

You only seek to be pleased,

By the care of another in sync,

With your emotions,

With your thoughts,

With your ideas,

With your fantasies and plots,

Love is real but finding her will leave you…

I can't really say,

Try finding out.

Poem 2

 

I hate the things that make others happy.

They never make me happy.

But it’s funny how I'm happiness to some people.

Consistent and unending cycle of pain,

Tortures me ceaselessly.

But I'm Immortal and a smile fixes more than tears do

I hope...

 

Poem 3

 

Why doesn't my happiness ever last?

Is it a hoax I'm meant to deal with?

An illusion only I can see beyond.

Am I the fault?

Am I the flaw?

Am I the problem?

Should I be here?

Is this healthy?

Treating others and ignoring myself,

Sinking deeper and pulling others out,

The darkness hurts,

I can feel it creeping in,

I've kicked everyone who brought any bit of light,

Cast them aside,

Now there's no one,

It's pitch black.

Soaking in nothingness and emptiness,

I drown

I drown...

But I'm loved.

Fuck!

This isn't right.

Where's SMD, Zabel, Eunice, GB...?

Where's Black?

Where's Nicole?

Where's my baby boo?

Why's is so dark?

I'm just...

I'll stop now.

I'll stop right here.

I'm perfectly fine.

I'm immortal in the end,

They aren't.

So I'll be fine.

They trust me enough to stay alive.

 

Poem 4

 

My empress is scared of the dark,

She holds my hands tight when the sun goes down,

"I love you" she'd say.

Reaffirming herself and me that the darkness would pass.

It hurts me to see her hurt,

But I can't do much.

I hold her hand tightly,

"I love you too" I reply.

Reminding her I'm there with her,

The dark is blinding,

It's quiet,

Peaceful,

Serene,

The dark wraps us in its embrace,

Sitting with our scars,

We wait and watch.

Hand In hand,

Her head on my chest,

Breathing slowly,

As we wait for light.

Poem 5

 

Fell in love,

That fucked me up.

Pretty eyed,

Slender,

Unique beauty,

Found a companion, an angel,

She showed me hell in the end.

The happiness she gave was never mine to keep.

 

Found friends,

That fucked me up.

Amazing,

Funny and interesting,

Nice vibed people,

Still fucked me up though.

Couldn't keep the relationships,

Didn't have the energy,

Didn't have the tools,

Left a lot of good people in bad places.

 

Found myself,

Still fucked up.

Pretty eyes,

Nice voice,

Charming delight,

Narcissism eats away,

Laziness prevailing,

Talents in a myriad of places,

Still fucked up though.

 

These words are raw,

Fucked up,

Unique,

Beautiful,

Not worthy,

Uninspired,

In(sane),

But I'm sane,

I hope...

 

Life,

Love,

Friends,

Family,

Legit low key fucked facade.

 

I have no reason to feel this way,

Simply slowing myself down,

But it's fun I guess,

Being a SADIST,

Hurts though,

But it's all I've got.

 

 

FEEL HOWEVER YOU MUST

 

Poem 6

 

Write,

Write,

Write,

Hhik,

Yuuiuuu,

Huuuhh,

I'm pretty sad.

 

 

P.S: There was no typo.

 

Poem 7

 

You see among us, shadow fight and Injustice.

I see tools that give me peace,

Lies I hide behind,

Thing that make me feel bliss.

 

There's Injustice among us that we fight in the shadows,

But that'll have to wait for tomorrow,

I've got to grind and I have chests to open,

These vain tasks keep my eyes open.

 

I'm losing sleep,

But trying to die less,

Fair trade if you ask me.

It's all good,

I try to be fine,

So it'll work out eventually.

 

So for now I'll keep playing my games,

Sorry using my coping mechanisms...

I mean my tools to stay alive,

If you got anyone we could play together,

Please do tell.

Loneliness and are have been together for years.

 

P.S: Comment any multiplayer PvP game we could play.

 

Poem 8

 

Help!

There are actual people that need this.

Broken and seemingly helpless.

What do you offer them?

Sex?

Drugs?

Advice?

When all they need is help.

I won’t tell you what help is.

It’s also formless.

 

Mini story

 

"James why? Why is leaving the only option? You love me, don't you? Don't you!?" Sarah screamed as I slipped out of her hands.

Her hands ached and hurt but she held on to me with her last bit of power, it wasn't enough for her, but she offered it to me.

"There's nothing left Sarah. I can't love you any more than I do now, but I don't love me like that" I said smiling the cut on my chest bleeding profusely.

All she needed to do was let go of me, she simply needed to let go yet here she was, holding on to something she knew she would lose soon. The explosion had pushed me over the Cliff injured us both badly but before I fell to my doom she held on to me refusing to admit she was hurting.

I knew like always that she was in pain, she never could hide it from me and now it was an obvious situation, but do I let myself be saved only to leave once again.

"Sarah I have to go. It's the only way" I said tears rolling down my eyes as I smiled, looking at her strained expression and the pain she was trying so desperately to hide from me. I knew it was the only way and I would take the decision. I had to, right?

"I'm not leaving you alone! You promised. James you promised!" She said, the pain seeping out of her words.

"I love you, Sarah," I said giving up hope completely as the sound of cracking crew louder beneath my feet.

"Okay then, we go out in style," Sarah said holding onto my hands tighter than ever as she rolled off the cliff dragging me along.

I was pulled towards her and she grasped me, Hugging me tightly as we fell.

"I love you" she whispered chuckling as we landed on the thorny ground.

It was only a few seconds but that was forever to us.

 

 

Outro

 

I hope you enjoyed this, you’ll hear from me again…